Self-states, Unmet Needs in Narcissists, Borderlines
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the concept of the self, internal objects, and self-states. He explains how the self is a privileged internal object that communicates with all other internal objects, introducing order and structure. He delves into the formation and function of self-states, emphasizing their responsiveness to unmet needs and their permeability. Additionally, he touches on coping strategies in individuals with personality disorders, such as narcissistic and schizoid solutions, and the dialogues between internal objects and self-states.
Narcissist’s Femme Fatale – or Mother?
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the confusion of states of mind in narcissism, particularly possessiveness, romantic jealousy, and mortification. He explains the triggers and reactions of possessiveness and romantic jealousy, and the introspective nature of mortification. He also delves into the different types of intimate partners that provoke these reactions in narcissists. Ultimately, he emphasizes the potential for mortification to lead to self-analysis and transformation in narcissists.
Anxious People – Narcissists? (2nd Webinar on Stress and Depression Management)
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses anxiety from various angles, including the philosophical angle. He explains that anxiety disorders are often misdiagnosed as narcissistic personality disorder because both types of patients are worried about social approval and seek feedback, admiration, and applause. However, the narcissist is egosyntonic, while the anxious patient is egodystonic. Anxiety is an essential component of existence, bad faith existence, inauthentic existence, and authentic existence. Anxiety is intimately connected to the schizoid core of personality disorder, to the need to maintain an authentic existence, and it’s intimately connected to narcissistic spectacle, to displays of grandiosity, to attempts to solicit narcissistic supply.
YOU in Narcissist’s Harem of Internal Objects
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the narcissist’s convoluted relationships with internal objects. He explains the distinction between external and internal objects and delves into the narcissist’s interactions with internal objects. Vaknin explores the stages of separation-individuation and the impact of disrupted ego formation on object relations. He also examines the narcissist’s idealization, devaluation, shared fantasy, and approach-avoidance dynamics with internal objects. Additionally, he discusses the narcissist’s need to convert external objects into bad internal objects and the impact of the empty core on the schizoid patient’s strategies for dealing with it.
Drama Queens/Kings: Narcissists, Borderlines
Dramatic behavior is common in cluster B personality disorders, such as narcissistic, borderline, and antisocial personality disorders. Drama serves various psychological functions, including enhancing functionality, distancing oneself from trauma, regulating self-esteem, and manipulating others. It can also be a diversionary tactic or a form of emotional blackmail. While attention-seeking is often associated with dramatic behavior, it is not the primary motivation for most individuals with cluster B personality disorders.
Personality Disorders: Child’s Defense Against Madness (Schizotypy and Neoteny)
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the relationship between schizotypy and personality disorders. He explains that schizotypy is a spectrum that includes both positive and negative traits, such as creativity, cognitive disorganization, and impaired reality testing. He suggests that there are two types of psychopaths: primary psychopaths who are grandiose and impulsive, and secondary psychopaths who have access to emotions and empathy but are low on narcissism. He also explains that schizotypy is not a mental illness but a personality theory that suggests that everyone has some degree of disorganization and chaos.
Narcissist’s Internal Family System: Parts in Conflict
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the concepts of pseudo-identities, self-states, and complexes in individuals with mental health disorders. He explains the differences between these concepts and how they affect a person’s behavior, emotions, and thoughts. He also discusses the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model and its three types of parts: managers, exiles, and firefighters, and how they interact with each other. Ultimately, without treatment, personality disordered people can withdraw into a schizoid phase, disappearing externally as they had always been absent and void internally.
Why Narcissist Happy, Depressed, Remorseful? Plus Boredom
Sam Vaknin discusses the concept of effective ambivalence, where individuals with personality disorders experience contradictory moods simultaneously. He explains that narcissists, as well as individuals with other personality disorders, can be both happy and depressed at the same time due to their fragmented self-states. He also delves into the topic of boredom and its relationship to overstimulation, as well as the coping strategies and defenses used by Western civilization to combat boredom.
Boredom is Good For You
Boredom is not a bad thing, but rather the meaning of life. It is a reaction to overstimulation and a defense against being overwhelmed by life. Western civilization has developed defenses against boredom, such as the unconscious, fantasy, mastery, action, and diversion, but these only lead to increased boredom. Embracing profound existential boredom can lead to a healthy, meaningful, and authentic life, ultimately leading to enlightenment and freedom.
How Narcissist Snapshots YOU to Bad Object
The narcissist hates and needs you, and he internalizes and converts you into a bad object. This process is called snapshotting, and it involves creating an internal object that represents you and interacting with it. The narcissist’s state of mind is that of a two-year-old, and he experiences his overpowering need for you as love, but it’s actually hate. The narcissist’s reactions to manufactured bad objects include anger, depression, and schizoid withdrawal states. The narcissist’s psychosexuality is influenced by the schizoid state, leading to sexlessness and abusive transactional relationships. The narcissist’s behavior in all relationships, including business and friendships, follows a similar pattern of grooming, devaluation, discard, and replacement.