Borderline’s Mating Strategies, Mismanaged Aggression
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the role of aggression in Cluster B personality disorders, particularly in borderline personality disorder. He explains that healthy aggression is externalized and sublimated, while unhealthy aggression is both externalized inappropriately and internalized self-destructively. This ambivalent duality leads to approach-avoidant behaviors and decompensatory acting out in individuals with borderline personality disorder. Vaknin suggests that Cluster B patients need to learn how to externalize aggression safely and sublimate it in socially acceptable ways to improve their mental health and relationships.
From Narcissistic Cities to Psychopathic Metaverse (EXCERPT)
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the historical process of the transition from nature to the metaverse, and how it has led to the rise of narcissism and other mental health disorders. He explains that the move from agriculture to cities led to the loss of non-narcissistic traits and behaviors, and the rise of competitiveness, ambition, and lack of empathy. The transition from cities to the metaverse will have much worse outcomes, as cyberspace is solipsistic, self-centered, and aggressive, leading to a transition from narcissism to psychopathy. Ultimately, Vaknin argues that cities and the metaverse have been and will be unmitigated disasters for human psychology and the environment.
SECRET Reason Narcissist Devalues, Discards YOU
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the mysterious behavior of narcissists, including devaluation, discard, and replacement. He explains that narcissists recreate the dynamics of their early childhood conflicts with their mothers through their intimate partners, aiming to achieve successful separation and individuation. The narcissist devalues and discards their partner as a way to separate from them, and this process is not the partner’s fault. Vaknin also discusses how urbanization and the rise of cities have contributed to the increase in narcissism, and he predicts that the transition from cities to the metaverse will lead to a shift from narcissism to psychopathy.
Narcissistic Abuse Recovery: First Separate, Individuate
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the process of separation individuation, which involves dissociation, objectification, and grandiosity, and is a prime example of healthy narcissism. However, if anything goes wrong in this process, narcissism arises and erupts. Narcissism is a failure of separation individuation owing to a lack of boundaries between the child and their mother. The narcissist aggressively and grandiosely converts their partner into what is called a self-object or an object representation, eliminating their ability to separate from them and regarding them as a symbol, voice, or representation, not as a real person.
Here’s Why We’re All Doomed (Excerpt)
In a world that is mentally ill, the construct of individual mental illness is dead. Mental illness of the individual is positively reinforced in a deranged world. The environment no longer provides cues on how to be healthy, and there is no unscripted exposure therapy. Narcissism and psychopathy are thriving, and dark triad personalities are at the top. The sick rise to the top when the world is sick, and there is nothing we can do about this.
Caught in Narcissist’s Pendulum: Romantic Jealousy and Sex
In this transcript, Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the contradictory and bizarre behaviors of narcissists, particularly in terms of romantic jealousy, possessiveness, and sexuality. He explains that these behaviors are driven by the narcissist’s need for grandiosity and a sense of uniqueness, as well as their utilitarian, transactional, and instrumental approach to relationships. Narcissists use romantic jealousy and possessiveness to prevent challenges to their grandiosity and to avoid losing their intimate partners, while their fluctuating sexual behaviors serve to captivate and capture partners in the shared fantasy.
When We Lose the Plot, Fall Apart: Narrative Failure
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the role of narratives in mental health and mental illness. Healthy individuals have multiple narratives for different situations, while mentally unhealthy individuals have one rigid narrative at a time. In mental illness, the individual creates multiple selves, each with its own narrative, to cope with various situations. Vaknin uses the examples of virtue signaling and depression to illustrate how narratives can impact mental states and mental illness. Narratives can override and camouflage mental illnesses, demonstrating their powerful influence on individuals.
How to Be Good Enough Mother
In this video, Professor Sam Vaknin answers questions about motherhood and what it means to be a woman. He explains that mothering is a social function and has nothing to do with genitalia or gender roles. A good mother’s main role is to frustrate the child and encourage them to become separate from her, fostering boundaries and a proper reality testing. Vaknin also notes that anyone, regardless of genitalia or body composition, can fulfill the role of a mother, and that mental health issues are the only likely barrier to being a good enough mother.
Transgender, Transsexual: Biology or Society?
Sex is biologically determined by gametes, but there is a god-awful confusion between sex and gender. Gender is a social cultural construct, and gender roles are shaped by societal needs. Gender is performative, and gendered personality is an integral part of identity. Women raise both boys and girls, and studies have shown that women raise girls differently to the way they raise boys, which creates an asymmetry in the way boys and girls are raised.
Can Men Be Good Mothers? Can AI Robots?
Gender roles are social constructs and not biologically determined. While sex is largely determined at birth, gender is a result of socialization and upbringing. Anyone, regardless of their sex, can fulfill the role of a mother or father, as these roles are jobs with specific functions and qualifications. The way boys and girls are raised by their mothers can create an imbalance in emotional expression and contribute to gender-related issues in society.