Psychopathic (Malignant) Narcissist: Best of Both Worlds (with Jim Mora, New Zealand)
Sam Vaknin, a diagnosed psychopathic narcissist, explains that narcissism is a desperate attempt to obtain attention to regulate the internal landscape of the narcissist. He describes the signs of narcissism, distinguishes between narcissistic personality disorder and narcissistic style, and argues that it is impossible for narcissists to have successful relationships. Narcissism is not treatable because it is the entire personality that is deformed beyond reconstruction in early childhood. Sam Vaknin discusses his journey of self-discovery and how he became an expert on narcissistic personality disorder.
7 Phases of Shared Fantasy: Narcissist Needs YOU to Make Him Great Again
Professor Sam Vaknin’s conceptual framework for understanding narcissists’ interpersonal relationships is based on the idea of a shared fantasy. The process begins with co-idealization, where the narcissist idealizes their partner and themselves. This is followed by dual mothership, where the narcissist and their partner take on maternal roles for each other. The narcissist then mentally discards their partner, leading to devaluation and splitting. Finally, the narcissist may attempt to re-idealize their partner to resolve anxiety caused by the devalued internal representation of their partner.
Borderline, Narcissist: Why They Can’t Let Go of Each Other
The professor discusses the comments on his video and then delves into the differences between the shared fantasies of borderlines and narcissists. He explains that both types of individuals have similarities and traits, but their shared fantasies have different functions and dynamics. The narcissist’s shared fantasy is about engulfing, while the borderline’s shared fantasy is about being engulfed. He also explains the reasons behind the hoovering behavior of both types.
Why Narcissist Can’t Get You Out of His Mind? (Introject Constancy)
Narcissists use splitting as a defense mechanism, which involves seeing themselves as all good and others as all bad. They idealize their partner, but then need to discard them to separate from their original mother. To do this, they devalue their partner by taking the idealized snapshot of them and imbuing it with negative qualities. However, they cannot get rid of the internal object, causing them to devalue and discard their partner in reality. This is due to introject constancy, where the narcissist creates internal objects that are constant and reliable, unlike external objects.
Narcissist First Discards You in His Mind, Then in Reality (EXCERPT)
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the process of idealization, devaluation, discard, and replacement in the context of narcissistic behavior. He explains the psychological dynamics behind these stages and how they relate to the narcissist’s need to separate from their intimate partner. Vaknin delves into the complexities of the narcissist’s mindset and the internal struggle they face in justifying their actions. He also explores the discrepancy between the sequence of events in the narcissist’s mind and their actual behavior.
Signs Narcissist About to Discard, Devalue You
In a narcissist’s mind, the sequence of idealization, discard, and devaluation is reversed compared to their behavior in reality. They idealize their partner, then emotionally discard them in their mind, and finally devalue them to justify the discard. However, in reality, they must devalue their partner before discarding them to keep them around for the devaluation process. This discrepancy occurs because the narcissist needs their partner to be present during the devaluation phase, which wouldn’t be possible if they discarded them immediately after idealization.
Retort: I Seek Truth (Freedom), Not Common “Wisdom” (Slavery)
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses cognitive dissonance and how people often lie to themselves and others to defend their decisions, such as parents claiming that children bring happiness into their lives. He also talks about how abuse is often misperceived as love and how the truth sets people free. Vaknin emphasizes the importance of committing to facts and truth in psychology and warns against political correctness, fakes, falsities, lies, and new age nonsense. Finally, he recommends an article in the Daily Mail about narcissistic abuse.
Inner Child Second Chance: Using Psychosis to Heal NPD, BPD
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the progression from childhood psychosis to mental health and how it can go awry, leading to narcissism, borderline personality disorder, or psychopathy. He explains that all children start in a state of psychosis, and as they grow, they should transition to a healthy mental state. However, if this process is disrupted, the child may develop borderline personality disorder or narcissism. Decompensation in therapy can lead to regression, allowing the inner child to start again from the psychotic phase and progress to health with the help of a therapist.
4 Facts to Blow Your Mind: Abuse, Parenting, Stress, Marshmallows
In this transcript, Professor Sam Vaknin discusses four controversial topics in psychology. First, he states that parents are generally less happy than childless people, becoming happier when their children leave home. Second, he argues that abusive behavior in relationships can indicate love and emotional investment. Third, he claims that stress can be beneficial, while meditation and mindfulness can have negative effects. Lastly, he discusses the marshmallow test, suggesting that delayed gratification is influenced more by culture and society than by individual traits.
New Light on Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) in DSM-5-TR and ICD-11
Psychology is currently in turmoil with new diagnostic texts, definitions, and clinical insights. The DSM-5 text revision and the ICD-11 both offer new approaches to understanding borderline personality disorder (BPD). The distinction between complex trauma and BPD is blurry, and some scholars argue that various personality disorders, including narcissistic and borderline, should be considered post-traumatic conditions. The ICD-11 has moved towards a dimensional approach, focusing on aspects like identity, empathy, and antagonism, suggesting that all personality disorders may be part of a single underlying clinical entity.