Narcissists Love Your Victimhood (Game Changers Interview 3 of 3)
Dr. Sam Vaknin discusses the challenges of educating potential victims of narcissistic abuse, emphasizing that education alone is not enough to prevent victimization. He explains that victims often have unclear personal boundaries, are people-pleasers, and have deep psychological needs that make them prone to victimhood. Vaknin suggests that it is more important to address the psychology of the victim than their cognitive capacity to recognize abuse. He also highlights the need to restore faith in the future for both victims and narcissists, as well as the elites who have lost perspective on the future.
Lamenting the New Normal (with Megan Fox, The Fringe)
Sam Vaknin, a professor of psychology and economics, discusses the misuse of psychological disorders in family courts and the rise of narcissism and psychopathy in society. He also addresses the lack of expertise in certain fields, the impact of victimhood on individuals, and the intersectionality of abuse. He emphasizes the need for personal responsibility and accountability.
How Narcissists Undermine Workplaces, Businesses (Game Changers Interview 2 of 3)
In this conversation, Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the effect of narcissism on the workplace. He explains that Western workplaces encourage the abuse of power and objectify workers, creating an incentive for both overt and covert narcissists. The hierarchy in Western workplaces is a Western invention, and it is part of Western civilization because the West organizes itself around industry. The only solution to narcissism and psychopathy in corporations and institutions is to transition from hierarchy to network, as the network organizational principle has numerous advantages and can counter the undue influence of narcissists and psychopaths.
Lose Your Narc Online Retreat with Mary Kane (LINKS in DESCRIPTION)
The transcript is a conversation between a woman who has been a victim of narcissistic abuse and Professor Sam Vaknin, an expert on narcissism. Vaknin discusses the nature of narcissism, its historical context, and the language he developed to describe it. He explains that narcissism is a form of self-love that is compensatory for deep-seated feelings of inadequacy and shame. Vaknin also describes the phases of a relationship with a narcissist, including love bombing, grooming, shared fantasy, and eventual devaluation and discard. He emphasizes the importance of boundaries, self-awareness, and the dangers of defining oneself as a victim. Vaknin also touches on the rise of narcissistic traits in women and the societal implications of this trend. The conversation concludes with Vaknin offering advice on how to protect oneself from narcissistic abuse and the importance of not perpetuating victimhood.
Big Bang of Narcissism (Game Changers Interview 1 of 3)
Dr. Sam Vaknin, a writer and psychologist, discusses narcissism and narcissistic abuse in society. He coined the phrase “narcissistic abuse” in 1995 to distinguish it from other forms of abuse, as it targets all dimensions of the victim simultaneously with the aim of eliminating the victim. Vaknin believes that the explosion of narcissism in society is due to population growth and the culture of consumption, which objectifies human beings. He also notes that political leaders reflect the underlying realities of the population, and that the electorate is narcissistic, which is why leaders are narcissistic. The conversation also touches on the role of the market and social media in perpetuating narcissistic behavior patterns.
Narcissist’s Emotional Involvement Preventive Measures (EIPMs)
In 1997, Professor Sam Vaknin published the first digital book on narcissism, which included a chapter on Emotional Investment Prevention Mechanisms (EIPMs). EIPMs are deceptive ways to avoid emotional involvement, commitment, and intimacy. Narcissists use various EIPMs in their personality, conduct, instincts, drives, object relations, functioning, and performance to deter others and maintain emotional distance. This results in a negative, detached life for the narcissist, who spends significant energy avoiding attachment and commitment.
Study: Weak Self of Covert Narcissists, Secondary Psychopaths
A study has found that individuals with Cluster B personality disorders, specifically those with dark triad traits, have a weak, unstable, and unclear sense of self. The study’s authors suggest that recognizing these traits is important in predicting behaviors and avoiding destructive, impulsive, and callous behaviors. The study also found that high-level dark triad traits are associated with a weaker sense of self, regardless of gender and age. However, when analyzing sub-traits of narcissism, psychopathy, and Machiavellianism, the study found that vulnerable narcissism and secondary psychopathy are most strongly correlated with a weaker or unclear sense of self.
Men, We Miss You, Please Come Back! Signed: Your Women
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the current state of men and how it has driven women to behave dysfunctionally. He highlights that men are underachievers, underemployed, and overrepresented in menial jobs, leading to resentment and withdrawal from relationships and commitment. This has forced women to take on both traditional male and female roles, leading to a “unigender” society with blurred gender roles and increased competition between men and women. Vaknin expresses concern for the future of intimacy and relationships, as the younger generation becomes more narcissistic and disconnected from one another.
Narcissist’s Outsourced Existence, Trauma-Bonded Fantasy with YOU
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses three solutions narcissists use to cope with their empty schizoid core: outsourced existence, substitutive existence, and displaced existence. Outsourced existence involves collecting bits of existence from the environment and experiencing it as their own. Substitutive existence involves internalizing whole people and assimilating their existence. Displaced existence involves living vicariously through others, experiencing existence by proxy. These solutions are often hampered by narcissistic traits such as devaluation, paranoia, passive aggression, and entitlement.
Rigid Personality to OCD: Break the Cycle
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the importance of self-discipline and its connection to self-efficacy, which is the ability to secure positive outcomes from one’s environment. A lack of self-discipline can lead to impaired self-efficacy, resulting in generalized anxiety. To overcome this, Vaknin suggests a five-step program: 1) identify constricting rigidity and magical thinking, 2) exit your comfort zone, 3) shift the locus of control and develop self-efficacy, 4) focus on one priority at a time, and 5) alternate between your pathologies and addictions.