Why Narcissists Can’t Think Straight (Constructs, Introjects, Memories, Defenses)
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the complex inner workings of a narcissist’s mind, focusing on constructs and introjects. Constructs are stable methods of organizing internal data to make sense of the world, while introjects are internal voices of meaningful others. In a narcissist, these constructs and introjects work together to maintain a false internal environment that conforms to their self-perception and prevents dissonance and anxiety. This manipulation of reality and memories serves to protect the narcissist from realizing that something is wrong with them.
Metaverse as Collective Narcissism, Fantasy, Mental Illness (with Benny Hendel)
The process of virtualization, which began with the transition from agriculture to cities, has led to a retreat from reality and a shift towards simulations. The metaverse, a combination of technologies that provide online simulations, is a more profound form of virtualization that could have significant psychological impacts. Dangers of the metaverse include solipsism, self-sufficiency leading to asocial behavior, and the potential for corporations to own and control reality. However, there are also potential benefits, such as increased efficiency in work and improved accessibility for disabled individuals.
Cheating, Triangulation in Sick Relationships: Power Play, Revenge, Entitlement
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses cheating and triangulation in relationships, particularly in obsessive and narcissistic relationships. In obsessive relationships, cheating and triangulation serve as tools to manage the relationship, establish hierarchy, and communicate with one another. In narcissistic relationships, cheating can be a result of seeking narcissistic supply, boredom, feeling superior, control issues, and fear of intimacy. Both types of relationships can lead to negative consequences and emotional turmoil for all parties involved.
4 Things To Say To Your Avoidant Borderline ( 5 Dynamics)
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the challenges of dealing with a borderline personality and offers advice on how to cope with their avoidance. He explains the internal processes and dynamics that drive the borderline’s behavior, including issues with attachment, identity disturbance, and dissociation. Vaknin also emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries and providing stability and reassurance to the borderline. He suggests specific sentences to say to a borderline in order to address their abandonment anxiety and provide a holding environment.
How Narcissist Sees YOU
In this transcript, Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the narcissist’s point of view and how they perceive their significant other. The narcissist takes a snapshot of their partner and idealizes them, but as reality sets in, they begin to change the way they see their partner. The narcissist sees themselves as a victim and their partner as an abuser, constantly blaming them for things and accusing them of being manipulative. The narcissist also accuses their partner of being self-destructive and lacking self-awareness, and may plot revenge if they feel humiliated or shamed.
Your Introjects (Inner Voices) are NOT YOU!
The internal objects, introjects, and voices that populate your inner world are not a part of your core identity, but rather a kind of attribution error. These voices are triggered by circumstances and events in your life, but they are not your identity. Silencing the introjects does have an effect on your behavior and choices, but it doesn’t have an effect on who you are. Therapies such as cognitive behavior therapy, schema therapy, and Gestalt therapy can help silence these introjects and remove them, leaving your authentic self.
Engulfment Anxiety Tips Bad Vs. Good Voices In Borderlines, Codependents, People Pleasers
Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is commonly associated with abandonment anxiety, but there is another type of anxiety that is less reported in literature, which is engulfment or enmeshment anxiety. This anxiety is triggered when a Borderline gets too intimate with someone, and it creates a feeling of being controlled from the outside, leading to a fear of being assimilated or digested. This anxiety is caused by the Borderline’s bad object, which is a collection of internal voices that inform them of their unworthiness and inadequacy. To cope with this anxiety, Borderlines should establish a people-free time and zone, introduce structure into their lives, and stop being emotionally invested in the past or future.
Regretting Your Promiscuity? Do This!
In this video, Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the differences in social sexuality and how it relates to mental illness. People with unrestricted social sexuality, who can have sex with strangers without any problem, are typically subclinical psychopaths. However, there are people who sleep with strangers habitually but hold conservative values, leading to cognitive dissonance and egodystonic behavior. These people may spiral down into a state of alcoholism and self-trashing, but there are effective treatments available, such as dialectical behavior therapy and behavior modification techniques. Vaknin encourages people to seek help and not give up on life.
Toxic Family Holidays Gathering Guide
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses coping with toxic families during holidays and family reunions. Toxic families are characterized by abusive, controlling, or humiliating behavior from one or more members. To cope with such families, one should accept the reality of the situation, plan ahead, set boundaries, and expect nothing. It is also important to avoid getting sucked into arguments, sensitive topics, and showing emotions. Lastly, it is crucial to have an exit strategy and debrief with a close friend or partner after the event.
Why Cerebral Narcissist Becomes Somatic ( Aging, Death)
Cerebral narcissists are individuals who redirect their entire libido and eros into intellectual pursuits, using their mind, intellect, and intelligence to secure favorable outcomes from the environment. This is due to sublimation, which involves converting drives, urges, and instincts into socially acceptable activities that consume the energy that should have gone to these drives, urges, and instincts. However, cerebral narcissists can transition to become somatic sex addicts following something known as narcissistic collapse, when they can no longer obtain supply in the classical traditional habituated ways. This transformation is very destabilizing for the narcissist, and they become very mournful, grieving, and furious, sometimes even suicidal.