Words which Describe the Narcissist (ADD YOUR OWN!)
The text is a list of adjectives describing different types of personalities, ranging from social and gregarious to unfriendly and abusive. The author encourages readers to add their own words to the list and mentions the possibility of creating a video compilation of the contributions.
Narcissist: Star of Own Theater of Conspicuous Existence
Narcissists engage in conspicuous existence, a form of conspicuous consumption where the consumed commodity is narcissistic supply. They stage-manage their every movement, tone of voice, posture, inflection, poise, text, subtext, and context to garner the most attention. Narcissists are excess embodied, and their constant invention of self is not limited to outward appearances. They are incessantly engaged in energy draining, gorging of other people and their possible reactions to him, and their exhaustion is all-consuming.
INTERVIEW Narcissists, Psychopaths Are Among Us! (with MIKE CROSS)
Sam Vaknin discusses psychopathy and narcissism, emphasizing their lack of empathy and manipulation of others. He warns of the dangers of having such individuals in positions of power and suggests that Western society rewards traits associated with these disorders. He also discusses the potential for psychopaths and narcissists to rise to the top in certain civilizations, but remains optimistic about the future.
Understanding Your Past and Future Relationships
Sam Vaknin discusses the importance of understanding the components of romantic relationships, including mate selection, relationship models, and termination triggers. He suggests that individuals should prioritize their expectations of relationships, including love, desire, stability, personal growth, and sexual compatibility. Additionally, he recommends identifying commitment triggers and predictors, building trust, and defining roles and responsibilities. By understanding these factors and establishing communication protocols with partners, individuals can increase the longevity of their relationships.
CHILLING: Conman in Action, Scammer Pounces on Prey
The text is a first-person narrative of a conman who lures his victim into a shared psychosis, infiltrating his mind and converting him to the cause. The conman is in control and manipulates his victim’s emotions, making him feel vulnerable and dependent on him. The victim is addicted to the conman’s attention and affection, and the conman exploits this to extract information and money from him. The conman is devoid of conscience and sees his victim as nothing more than a means to an end.
Narcissist: Can’t Afford Empathy (Dialog with Edwin Rutsch)
Sam Vaknin and Edwin Rutch discuss the concept of using cold empathy to induce social conformity in narcissists and psychopaths. Sam explains that empathy should be made a precondition for complying with the expectations and needs of narcissists and psychopaths, and that it could be used to convince them to play by certain rules. They also discuss the therapeutic process of Focusing and the difference between sensations and emotions. Sam discusses his need for narcissistic supply and how he objectifies people to extract it. The guest discusses their family’s traumatic experiences and their efforts to use empathic listening to heal dysfunction and miscommunication.
Cold Empathy Garners Narcissistic Supply (Edwin Rutsch and Sam Vaknin)
Sam Vaknin and a guest discuss the relationship between empathy and narcissism, with Sam suggesting that narcissists have “cold empathy” due to childhood trauma and abuse. They also discuss how society is becoming more narcissistic as a reaction to being overwhelmed with pain and an overload of pain in the media. Sam shares his personal experience of growing up in an abusive household and developing a delusional private world as a defense mechanism. He also discusses how empathic reflection and mirroring can provoke new ideas and enhance empathy, even in individuals who lack warm empathy.
Topsy-turvy: Paul Bloom Against, Vaknin for Empathy (Vaknin and Rutsch)
Summary: Edwin Rutch interviews Sam Vaknin about the concept of empathy and its application in various contexts. They discuss the limitations of individual empathy, the distinction between individual and institutional empathy, and the potential misuse of empathy in foreign policy and aid initiatives. They also explore the relationship between empathy and justice systems, and the need for a more empathic approach in resolving conflicts and restoring connections. The conversation delves into the complexities of measuring and quantifying empathy, and the potential for empathy to be misdirected or misused in various settings.
Furious Debate: Edwin Rutsch and Sam Vaknin on Empathy
Sam Vaknin, a diagnosed psychopathic narcissist and expert on narcissism, discusses empathy with Edwin Rutch from the Centre for Building a Culture of Empathy. Vaknin explains the two components of empathy, cold empathy and emotional arousal, and argues that while emotional arousal may be innate, the intersubjective component is learned. He also discusses the challenges of understanding and sharing emotions with others, and the differences between narcissism and psychopathy. Vaknin believes that individuals with narcissism and psychopathy are unlikely to develop empathy and that society’s values may be promoting these traits.
Children of Narcissist: Bad Mother’s Voice
There is no such thing as a purely good mother, and the bad mother is always present. The good mother is predictable, reliable, and emotionally safe, while the bad mother is considered paranoid and controlling. The good mother provides unconditional love, while the bad mother provides transactional love. The good son or daughter justifies the bad mother’s behavior, while every good quality of the good mother is rendered bad by the voice of the bad mother in the minds of children of narcissists.