Survive 6 Stages of Grief After Narcissistic Abuse (EXCERPT)
The text discusses the six stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance, and hope, with a focus on the unique experience of grieving a shared fantasy with a narcissist. It emphasizes the importance of self-compassion, validation of emotions, and seeking support from others in the healing process. The stages are described in detail, and the text encourages individuals to grieve in their own way and take the time needed for healing. It also highlights the significance of grounding oneself in life and finding hope for the future.
Why Do You Keep Repeating The Same Mistakes Repetition Compulsion!
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the concepts of fantasy, memory, and repetition compulsion in a series of three videos. He explains the differences between fantasy, daydreaming, wishful thinking, and dreams, and offers three techniques for self-reflection and planning for the future. He also delves into the role of memory in shaping identity and decision-making, particularly in individuals with certain personality disorders.
From Idealization To Discard, It Is All Abuse!
The text discusses the concept of the shared fantasy in narcissistic abuse. It explains how the shared fantasy triggers abusive behavior and why narcissistic abuse ceases only when the shared fantasy is definitively over. The narcissist’s abuse is reframed as tough love or a reaction to the partner’s behavior, and it is driven by the need to idealize the partner and avoid love, which is associated with negative outcomes. The abuse is intended to mold the partner to fit the narcissist’s idealized image, and it is emotionally infused with paternal or maternal feelings. The text also explains that the abuse stops when the shared fantasy is truly over and the partner’s internal representation in the narcissist’s mind loses its power. The cycle of abuse can be reactivated if the partner is re-idealized by
How Narcissist Deceives YOU ( Aggressive Mimicry Predator Faking Prey)
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the various forms of mimicry used by narcissists, focusing on aggressive mimicry. He explains how narcissists mimic other species or individuals to deceive and attract their prey, using signals to lure and captivate their victims. The mimicry involves deception, behavior modification, and selective advantage for the narcissist. The predatory behavior of narcissists is compared to mimicry in the animal kingdom, highlighting the impact on the prey and the model. Defensive mimicry and various types of mimicry are also explored in the context of narcissistic behavior. Mimicry is presented as a predatory strategy used by narcissists to manipulate and deceive their victims.
Parent Your Orphaned Self After Narcissistic Abuse
The text discusses the aftermath of narcissistic abuse and provides a four-stage process for self-parenting and healing. It emphasizes the importance of seeing oneself, creating boundaries with the internal parental figure, being one’s own secure base, and reintegrating with reality. It also highlights the significance of self-love based on self-awareness, self-acceptance, self-trust, and self-efficacy. The overall focus is on reclaiming one’s identity and well-being after narcissistic abuse.
13 Signs Of Mentally Ill Family
The text discusses 13 signs of mentally ill families, including enmeshment, emphasis on appearances, selective interface between internal and external realities, enforced narrative, competitive hierarchies, emphasis on the ambient, emotional blackmail, wrongful intimacies, past or future orientation, reinforcement of negative effects, role reversals, egodystonic members, and reification of insecure attachment styles and mental health issues. The author suggests scoring one’s own family and advises going no contact if the score is 10 or higher.
Get Parasite Narcissist Out of Your Colonized Mind
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the concept of shared fantasy as a form of paracosm, an alternative reality constructed by narcissists to manipulate and control their intimate partners. He delves into the intricate mechanisms of how narcissists hijack the minds of their victims through processes such as entraining and dissociation. Vaknin emphasizes the importance of memory recovery and the distinction between authentic emotions and those implanted by the abuser. He also explores the role of trauma and dissociation in perpetuating the effects of abuse.
Silent Treatment What Is It, How To Tackle It
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the concept of silent treatment, distinguishing it from other social behaviors and highlighting its characteristics and consequences. He explains that silent treatment is a form of abuse, and provides strategies for coping with and addressing it, including setting boundaries, using “I” statements, practicing self-care, and seeking help. He also emphasizes the damaging effects of silent treatment on both the giver and the receiver, and the importance of not taking it personally.
How To Get Your Narcissist to Therapy (“Granny Fanny Cris” Method)
The text discusses how to get a narcissist to attend therapy, emphasizing the importance of not directly confronting the narcissist’s grandiosity and instead using strategies such as co-opting their grandiosity, appealing to their self-conception, and leveraging crises to motivate them to seek therapy. It also highlights the challenges of therapy with narcissists, including their resistance and the need for therapists to collaborate with their grandiosity and fantasy defenses. The text also addresses the different types of crises that may drive a narcissist to therapy, such as ultimatums, mental disorders, and suicidality.
Borderline Demonizes Partner, Pathologizes Narcissist (Or Herself)
The text discusses the dynamics of borderline personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorder in relationships. It delves into the borderline’s paranoid ideation and the need to justify withdrawing from a partner. It also explores the concept of persecutory dynamics and the interplay between the borderline and narcissistic partner. Additionally, it touches on the narcissist’s devaluation and discard phases and the impact on the internal object.