Recognise Me? Ken Heilbrunn’s Take on the Narcissist
Sam Vaknin discusses his journey to becoming an expert on narcissism and the lack of information available on the subject when he first began studying it. He explains how he had to invent a new language to describe the complexities of pathological narcissism and coined terms such as “narcissistic abuse” and “empathy” to describe the kind of empathy that narcissists and psychopaths possess. Vaknin also reads an insightful essay by Ken Heilbrunn, MD, which describes the narcissist’s behavior and mindset.
Shame, Guilt, Codependents, Narcissists, and Normal Folks
Shame motivates normal people and those suffering from cluster B personality disorders, but it motivates them differently. Shame constitutes a threat to normal people’s true self, and it constitutes a threat to the false self of narcissism. There are two varieties of shame when we talk about narcissists in effect. There is narcissistic shame, which is the narcissist’s experience of the grandiosity gap and its affective correlate. The greater the conflict between grandiosity and reality, the bigger the gap and the greater the narcissist’s feelings of shame and guilt.
Narcissist Hates His Disabled, Sick, and Challenged Children
Narcissistic parents of disabled or sick children may view their child as an insult to their self-perceived perfection and omnipotence, leading to devaluation and humiliation of both the child and their mother. Some children may develop narcissistic tendencies themselves, while others may regress to a phase of primary narcissism. Narcissistic parents of seriously ill children may also seek attention and praise from medical personnel, but this should be distinguished from Munchausen syndrome and Munchausen syndrome by proxy, which involve inducing illness or injury in a dependent for attention and sympathy. In all cases, the child is used as a prop and may be discarded when they become autonomous or critical.
Civilization Ntopia: To Hell in a Narcissistic Handbasket
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the rise of pathological narcissism in modern society, which he believes is a ubiquitous phenomenon. He argues that healthy narcissism is rendered pathological by abuse and trauma, which are universal human behaviours. Vaknin also suggests that the way pathological narcissism manifests is dependent on the particulars of societies and cultures, and that human collectives can acquire a life and character of their own, which can lead to a common pathology.
Re-integrating the Narcissistic Personality
The lack of emotional self-acceptance is a problem that cannot be solved by cognitive substitutes. The root of the problem is the inner dialogue between disparaging voices and countervailing truths to the contrary. The disordered dialogue, the dysfunctional, the non-performing dialogue, involves widely disparate, different interlocutors. The first step is to clearly identify the various segments that together, however incongruently, constitute the personality.
DSM V Alternative Model for Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD)
The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM) is the bible of the psychiatric and psychological profession. The DSM-5 provides diagnostic criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder, but these criteria are deeply flawed and do not reflect the knowledge accumulated over the last 14 years. The DSM-5 attempts to remedy these shortcomings by proposing an alternative model of narcissism, which is more advanced than the DSM-4 but still falls short in certain areas. Overall, the DSM-5 is light years more advanced than the DSM-4 in subsuming and synthesizing current knowledge about narcissists, but there is still a long way to go.
System Re-victimizes, Pathologizes Victim, Sides with Offender, Abuser
The system, including academic institutions, law enforcement agencies, and the courts, often fails to take victims of abuse seriously and instead pathologizes and diminishes them. This is due to a lack of education and awareness about abuse and domestic violence. Abusers are often possessive, jealous, dependent, and narcissistic, while victims may blame themselves or have a history of abuse. Mental health professionals may also be biased towards the abuser and pathologize the victim, making it difficult for victims to receive proper help. Victims may need to stage a well-calibrated performance to convince therapists that they are victims and not be re-victimized by the system.
Misinformation: Covert vs. Classic Narcissist
Covert narcissists are not cunning or manipulative, but rather suppress their true nature due to a lack of confidence. They are their own worst critics and often feel guilty and ashamed of their aggressive urges. Covert narcissists team up with classic narcissists but secretly resent and envy them. Inverted narcissists are a type of covert narcissist who are self-centered, sensitive, vulnerable, and defensive, and crave relationships with narcissists despite any abuse inflicted on them.
INTERVIEW Narcissists, Psychopaths Are Among Us! (with MIKE CROSS)
Sam Vaknin discusses psychopathy and narcissism, emphasizing their lack of empathy and manipulation of others. He warns of the dangers of having such individuals in positions of power and suggests that Western society rewards traits associated with these disorders. He also discusses the potential for psychopaths and narcissists to rise to the top in certain civilizations, but remains optimistic about the future.
Raging Narcissist: Merely Pissed-off?
Narcissistic rage is a phenomenon that occurs when a narcissist is frustrated in their pursuit of narcissistic supply, causing narcissistic injury. The narcissist then projects a bad object onto the source of their frustration and rages against a perceived evil entity that has injured and frustrated them. Narcissistic rage is not the same as normal anger and has two forms: explosive and pernicious or passive-aggressive. People with personality disorders are in a constant state of anger, which is effectively suppressed most of the time, and they are afraid to show that they are angry to meaningful others because they are afraid to lose them.