Narcissist Frustrates Women with Ostentatious Fidelity
Narcissists, particularly cerebral narcissists, often frustrate women who are attracted to them by withholding sex or teasing them. This is because they are misogynists who hold women in contempt and fear them. They divide women into saints and whores, and view sex and intimacy as mutually exclusive. The narcissist’s frustrating behavior serves to secure a narcissistic supply and reenact unresolved conflicts with their mother. They pathologize women to control them and project their own parasitic behavior onto them.
The âLone Wolfâ Narcissist and His Prey
Narcissists require constant validation and attention, and their sense of entitlement clashes with their dependence on others for self-worth. Lone wolf narcissists who withdraw from society can become dangerous due to their unquenched hunger for narcissistic supply. Schizoids, on the other hand, are indifferent to social relationships and have a limited range of emotions and affect. Psychopaths lack empathy and disregard others as instruments of gratification, and they are often criminals. When narcissism, schizoid disorder, and psychopathy converge, it can result in extremely dangerous individuals.
Narcissist: I Love to be Hated and I Hate to be Loved
The author describes their love for being hated and their hatred for being loved. They enjoy the feeling of being feared and the attention that comes with their notoriety. They attack others sadistically and derive pleasure from inflicting pain. They also have a desire to be punished and feel that their persecution is proof of their uniqueness. The author also discusses the grandiosity gap and the constant background noise of demeaning laughter that the narcissist experiences.
Narcissist: Can’t Afford Empathy (Dialog with Edwin Rutsch)
Sam Vaknin and Edwin Rutch discuss the concept of using cold empathy to induce social conformity in narcissists and psychopaths. Sam explains that empathy should be made a precondition for complying with the expectations and needs of narcissists and psychopaths, and that it could be used to convince them to play by certain rules. They also discuss the therapeutic process of Focusing and the difference between sensations and emotions. Sam discusses his need for narcissistic supply and how he objectifies people to extract it. The guest discusses their family’s traumatic experiences and their efforts to use empathic listening to heal dysfunction and miscommunication.
Psychopath? 5 Red Flags and 3 Rs Test: Remorse, Remediation, and Restoration
Psychopaths are too good to be true and exhibit information asymmetry. They have alloplastic defenses and an external locus of control. Psychopathy can be a defense against anxiety, and narcissism can develop late in life. To determine if someone’s narcissism and psychopathy are an integral feature of their personality, apply the test of three R’s: remorse, remediation, and restoration. True narcissists and psychopaths fail the three R’s test at every turn.
Topsy-turvy: Paul Bloom Against, Vaknin for Empathy (Vaknin and Rutsch)
Summary: Edwin Rutch interviews Sam Vaknin about the concept of empathy and its application in various contexts. They discuss the limitations of individual empathy, the distinction between individual and institutional empathy, and the potential misuse of empathy in foreign policy and aid initiatives. They also explore the relationship between empathy and justice systems, and the need for a more empathic approach in resolving conflicts and restoring connections. The conversation delves into the complexities of measuring and quantifying empathy, and the potential for empathy to be misdirected or misused in various settings.
Children of Narcissist: Bad Mother’s Voice
There is no such thing as a purely good mother, and the bad mother is always present. The good mother is predictable, reliable, and emotionally safe, while the bad mother is considered paranoid and controlling. The good mother provides unconditional love, while the bad mother provides transactional love. The good son or daughter justifies the bad mother’s behavior, while every good quality of the good mother is rendered bad by the voice of the bad mother in the minds of children of narcissists.
Inanimate Objects as Sources of Narcissistic Supply
Narcissists can find inanimate objects as sources of narcissistic supply, as long as they have the potential to attract attention and admiration. Narcissists often use objects as status symbols, which can elicit admiration, envy, and aspiration from others. However, narcissists can also become attached to objects and memorabilia, which can provide emotional support and remind them of their past glories and potential future grandeur. Narcissists can objectify people and anthropomorphize objects to derive maximum narcissistic supply from both, leading to a shared psychosis and cult-like behavior among those closest to them.
Narcissist: Mother Looms Large
The success or failure of a child’s separation from their mother determines their personal history, autonomy, and sense of self. The mother is the benchmark against which everything in the child’s future is measured. If the mother does not let go, the child does not go, and if the mother is a dependent narcissistic type, the child’s growth prospects are doomed. The death of the mother is a devastating shock and a deliverance, and with the death of his mother, the narcissist embarks on a process of healing.
Paranoia, Narcissistic Mirroring, and Narcissistic Reflection
Narcissists tend to react with paranoia when they feel threatened, but these attacks tend to fade and the narcissist frequently homes in on new agents of persecution. The narcissist’s paranoia is a grandiose fantasy aimed to regulate their sense of self-worth. The narcissist’s partner tends to encourage their paranoid or threatening attention, and this is a game of two. Living with a narcissist can tilt one’s mind toward abnormal reactions, and even after separation, the narcissist’s partners typically still care for the narcissist greatly.