Narcissist’s Partner Reacts to Narcissist’s Sexuality (ENGLISH responses)
Partners of narcissists often deny the signs of their sexual behavior, which can be pretty open, including consuming pornography, having lovers, and trying to convince their partner to participate in threesomes and group sex. The rejection of the narcissist’s sexual practices by the partner is often a weapon used against the narcissist in arguments, rather than a genuine issue. The rejection of the narcissist’s needs by the partner is a great pity and a great obstacle to the relationship, and partners should sit back and consider what they are willing to do and what they are not willing to do.
Narcissist’s Painful Mother Redux (ENGLISH responses)
In this lecture, Professor Sam Vaknin discusses non-corporeal discipline, which involves infantilizing oneself to experience intimacy, love, and pain. This can be achieved through clear abuse, such as spanking, or by regressing to a period of childhood abuse, particularly from the mother figure. However, this can be dangerous as it triggers the narcissist to regress to childhood and experience all the emotions associated with that period, including shame and depression. Narcissists who practice submission or discipline experience shame and humiliation, leading to isolation, but then become super social to seek narcissistic supply. Vaknin also explains that no narcissist has a beautiful childhood, and that mothers who spoil their children or expect great things from them are abusing them. Good mothers should push their children away to become
Cerebral Narcissist’s Sexual Disneyland (ENGLISH responses)
Cerebral narcissists bring creativity, imagination, and multidimensionality to sex, making it more exciting and addictive than with somatic narcissists. However, the cerebral narcissist uses sex to acquire and capture the woman, making her addicted to him, and then abruptly stops the sex once he feels secure in the relationship. This creates severe cognitive, emotional, and axiological dissonance, leading to extreme behaviors in the partner, such as alcoholism or risky sexual behavior. Therefore, an open relationship or outsourcing sex is not a solution, and the only recommendation is to avoid a relationship with a cerebral narcissist altogether.
How Porn Destroyed Sex (and Narcissism, of course) (ENGLISH responses)
Pornography has severe psychological effects, even on those who consume it casually. It diminishes the ability to connect intimacy to sexual arousal, objectifies the female body, and reduces it to body parts. Pornography also includes a lot of aggression, which leads teenagers to expect real-life sex to be aggressive and violent. The boundaries between pornography and real-life sex have blurred to the point that men feel entitled to demand from women to be porn stars. Women have developed pornographic availability as a counter to pornography, and the whole real-life sex has become pornographic. Women are in a terrible situation because they have to escalate to attract men. Men don’t need women anymore because the only thing that a woman could give that was exclusive was her anatomy, and now, this is free. Women and men
Manipulate the Narcissist and Live to Tell About It? (Lecture in Budapest)
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the manipulation of narcissists, the prevalence of narcissistic traits in society, and the impact of aggression on children. He emphasizes that the only effective way to deal with a narcissist is to go no contact, as staying in contact can lead to adopting narcissistic behaviors oneself. He notes that narcissism is on a spectrum, with healthy narcissism at one end and narcissistic personality disorder at the other. Vaknin also observes that narcissism and psychopathy are becoming more socially accepted and even encouraged in certain contexts. He mentions that narcissists can recognize each other but not psychopaths, and that psychopaths prey on narcissists. Lastly, he discusses the impact of aggression on children, stating that witnessing or experiencing physical or sexual aggression can lead to destructive or self-destructive behavior, while verbal aggression tends to perpetuate verbal abuse within the family structure.
Narcissism? Not What You Think! (An El-Nadi-Vaknin Convo)
Narcissism is not a mental illness but a personality style, and narcissists can be self-aware and proud of their disorder. They can be manipulated if they are convinced that certain behaviors are counterproductive and harmful to themselves. Women who fall for narcissists often do so because of their own psychological reasons, and unless they address these issues, they are likely to fall into the same trap repeatedly.
Narcissist: Ego Outsourced, Self Faked (ENGLISH responses, with Nárcisz Coach)
The false self in narcissists is the only active element, fulfilling ego functions and interacting with the world. The false self is a defense mechanism created by the child to protect against pain and trauma, leading to grandiosity and a sense of superiority. Ultimately, the narcissist becomes an empty facade, a simulation of a human being, leaving victims with a sense of horror and disorientation. Even after physically removing the narcissist from their lives, victims struggle to rid themselves of the narcissist’s presence in their heads, leading to a form of psychological contamination and a sense of psychosis.
Narcissist-Victim Sexual Practices (ENGLISH responses, with Nárcisz Coach)
Sam Vaknin discusses the cycle of narcissistic abuse and how victims often find themselves repeatedly attracted to narcissistic partners. He suggests that true transformation and healing can only occur when the victim hits rock bottom and has no source of energy left. Vaknin also explains the difference between consensual BDSM and sadism in narcissistic relationships, which is used as a tool for objectification and control. He notes that narcissists often have severe problems with sexual identity and sex differentiation due to disrupted development in childhood.
Narcissist: Traumatized Child and Victim (ENGLISH responses, with Nárcisz Coach)
Narcissism can be a post-traumatic condition, either from early childhood trauma or from specific life circumstances, such as becoming a celebrity. Narcissism is a defense mechanism that can be activated in victims of abuse, leading them to become indistinguishable from narcissists. Complex post-traumatic stress disorder (CPTSD) is often the outcome of prolonged narcissistic abuse and can lead to borderline personality disorder, which is characterized by narcissism. Narcissism is contagious and can spread like an infectious disease.
Narcissism as a New Religion (ENGLISH responses, with Nárcisz Coach)
Narcissism is a cyclical problem that leads to social unrest, bloody rebellions, and massive wars. It is not only a mental health disorder but also a new religion that is similar to Islam, Christianity, Judaism, or Buddhism. Narcissism is a non-monotheistic religion with as many gods as there are adherents, and it is the first network religion. It is a modern religion that uses the dominant metaphor of networking, and within a few decades, it will be the dominant religion.