“ Science” Of Psychology: Presentism, Other Errors
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the limitations of psychology and social sciences, arguing that they cannot be considered true sciences due to their reliance on social and cultural values. He highlights the concept of presentism and anachronism in historical and psychological analysis, emphasizing the influence of contemporary beliefs and values on research and teaching. Vaknin also addresses the shifting meanings of words and the prevalence of misinformation in psychology and related fields, ultimately critiquing the pretension of psychology as a science and the toxic nature of the self-help industry.
Message to Mentally Ill: You are Doing the Best You Can!
Mental illness is a pervasive, consuming, and defining force that affects individuals and their relationships. It is a constant companion, overwhelming and debilitating, leading to self-loathing and self-defeat. The mentally ill face stigma, ostracization, and ridicule, as they struggle to fit in and make others happy. Despite the challenges, they continue to strive for success and self-acceptance, embracing defeat and failure as part of their journey.
Flying Monkeys of Narcissist Zero: Language of Narcissistic Abuse
Professor Sam Vaknin insists on being credited for his work because he values history and memory. He claims to have coined a significant amount of language related to narcissism and narcissistic abuse, and he believes it’s important to recognize paternity, provenance, and intellectual lineage. He argues that plagiarism is intellectual murder and that people deserve credit for their work. He sees the lack of recognition as a threat to civilization, as it sacrifices time and memory for instant gratification.
Covert Narcissist’s Abuse= Coercive Control?
Today’s lecture covers covert narcissistic abuse and coercive control. Covert narcissists engage in passive-aggressive abuse, creating networks of people to target and manipulate others. Coercive control, a rare phenomenon, involves intimidation, social isolation, invasive monitoring, and deprivation of basic needs. It is a premeditated, goal-oriented strategy that is not the result of mental illness and should be fought against. This type of control is distinct from typical abuse and reflects a power asymmetry.
Why Narcissist Hates Good Partners Sado Maso Love (plus Mood Disorders)
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the narcissist’s interpretation of love, which is rooted in sadistic and masochistic impulses. He also clarifies the difference between mood disorders and cognitive distortions, and the role of the shared fantasy in the narcissist’s relationships. The narcissist’s love revolves around pain, its infliction, management, and gratification, as well as the ability to regulate and modulate it. The narcissist’s behavior is driven by early childhood conditioning and a deep-seated belief that love is associated with negative emotions and pain.
MAIDness of Assisted Suicide and Lonely Happiness
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the topics of suicide and socialization in the context of mental health. He argues against recommending suicide as an option for mentally ill patients and challenges the notion that socializing is universally linked to happiness. Vaknin also emphasizes the importance of preventing suicide and the role of mental health practitioners in equipping patients with tools to combat cognitive distortions. Additionally, he highlights the Harvard study of adult development, which suggests that maintaining good health and building loving relationships are key factors in long-term happiness. However, he also acknowledges that socializing may not be suitable for everyone, particularly those with schizoid personality disorder.
Emotional Flashbacks of Gaslighting Empaths and Other Ignorant Nonsense (Compilation)
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the concepts of empathy and gaslighting, criticizing the use of the term “empath” as a self-aggrandizing label with no clinical significance. He asserts that everyone has empathy, including narcissists and psychopaths, who possess a form of “cold empathy.” Vaknin warns that individuals who claim to have met their “twin flame” are likely being groomed by a narcissist or psychopath through a process of idealized mirroring and identification, which leads to self-infatuation and a shared fantasy with cult-like features. He explains that the “twin flame” becomes a surrogate parental figure and a false self, regressing the individual to an infantile state of dependency and fusion, ultimately compromising their identity and autonomy. Vaknin advises against adopting the label of “empath” as it reinforces the abuser’s control and impedes personal growth and healing.
Recover from Narcissistic Abuse: Accept Your Role in It (with Brian Barnes)
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses his personal journey from prison to becoming an expert on narcissism and narcissistic abuse. He emphasizes the importance of self-awareness, self-acceptance, and self-forgiveness as tools for recovery. He also addresses the challenges of co-parenting with a narcissist and the impact on children. Despite his contributions to the field, he admits to lacking emotional resonance and self-care due to his own narcissistic tendencies.
Are You Narcissist’s MOTHER Or TOY?
The text discusses the narcissist’s relationship with others as toys and the concept of transitional objects in psychology. It explains how the narcissist’s inability to separate from the mother leads to a lack of attachment and the use of intimate partners as mother substitutes. The text also delves into the psychopathic aspect of the narcissist and the role of transitional objects in facilitating separation from the mother.
How to Love Yourself Into Healing, But Not Become a Narcissist (Compilation)
In this lecture, Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the importance of self-love and the steps to develop a core identity. He emphasizes the significance of relationships and distinguishes between micro-relationships, real relationships, and pseudo-relationships. Vaknin highlights the need to maintain individuality within relationships and stresses the importance of taking responsibility for one’s choices and behaviors. He outlines the four conditions for healthy self-love: self-awareness, self-acceptance, self-trust, and self-efficacy. Vaknin also delves into the significance of finding meaning in life and the value of introspection and silence in personal growth and healing.